Your Inner Child Needs You

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A lot of us desperately want to break free from what once broke us. But the real question is: what are we doing to start living instead of just surviving? I want to share with you three ways to begin the healing you’ve been longing for. 

As someone who has lived through childhood and relationship traumas, I know how hard it is to recover and move on. Deep down, you wish you could wake up one day, say, “F this, I’m ready to live a beautiful life,” and feel at peace. But between the pain you carry and the happiness you crave, there’s a gap you don’t know how to cross. 

I think of healing like a weight loss journey. You know how you want your body to look, but it won’t happen overnight. You need discipline, effort, and consistency. If you fall back into old habits, the weight returns, and you start over. The difference with healing is that trauma isn’t something you chose. It was handed to you by people who were often battling their own demons. That hurts, especially when they never take responsibility. But here’s the truth: we don’t have to let them ruin our lives. 

Healing is possible, but it takes more than reading quotes or watching motivational videos. It takes action. Here are three powerful ways to begin:  

1. Do something kind for yourself every day. 

Healing starts with small, intentional acts of self-love. It doesn’t have to be extravagant, no international trips required. It can be as simple as taking a long shower, wearing the clothes you’ve been “saving,” cooking yourself a healthy breakfast, or taking a quiet walk. These aren’t just routines; they’re daily reminders that you deserve care and joy. Time spent with yourself will never be wasted. 

2. Put yourself first, unapologetically. 

Stop saying you’ll put yourself first and start doing it. Sometimes that looks like ignoring a call you don’t have the energy for, the guilt trip, the drama, the shallow check-in. Protect your peace. Some people will never get the healed version of you, and that’s okay. As the saying goes: “Only God and fools never change.” Change is necessary. Not everyone deserves access to the healed version of you, and that’s okay. Change is part of growth, and those who love you will grow with you.  

3. Heal your inner child. 

This step is non-negotiable. Many of us missed out on simple joys as kids, and giving those moments back to ourselves is deeply healing.  I’m 30 years old and just learning to swim for the first time, and when I tried on my swimsuit, I was twirling around my living room like a little girl at a candy store. It felt amazing. Healing is often in the “little things.” Think back: what brought you joy as a child? Riding a bike? Playing in the rain? Painting your nails with bold colors? Hosting a sleepover with popcorn, movies, and laughter until 2 a.m. just for fun? Do it. It might feel silly at first, but those little acts of joy are powerful. They remind your inner child that you are safe now, that life can be fun, and that it’s okay to play again.  Revisit the joys you once craved. Your inner child will thank you.  

Healing from trauma is one of the hardest and most rewarding journeys you’ll ever take. It requires courage, consistency, and self-compassion. If you want to know what life feels like beyond the pain, you must take the first step.  

Start by doing one kind thing for yourself every day. Protect your peace by putting yourself first. Surround yourself with people who respect and support your healing. And never forget to love your inner child, they deserve joy, laughter, and freedom to play. If you do these things consistently, a year or two from now you’ll be in a much stronger place mentally, physically, and emotionally. 

 When you choose yourself, you lose nothing and open the door to everything life has to offer.